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Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
2
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Articles In This Section:
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
1
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
2
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
3
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
4
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
5
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
6
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
7
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
8
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
9
· Special Gifts, Devices, and Techniques - part
10
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Who has not observed this sort of thing! Among refined grownups there may be little of it. But in schools and factories, the amount of conversational bullying is vast.
Not until the last judgment will there be an estimate of the enormous amount of pang and agony, mostly silent, that is piled up on the world by careless, unkind teasing, teasing against the ones who are precisely least able to meet it. I beg you with all earnestness not to offend on this score. As a preliminary precaution, you ought to make it a cast-iron rule not to tease any person whom you in any way dislike or who may imagine himself to be disliked. If you really like a person, then any teasing is likely to end with the edge taken off — if not by the words, then by the tone. But if deep in your heart you do not like a person, then almost any teasing is likely to end with the edge imbedded — either by the words, or the tone. In any circle you should direct your shafts at those who most certainly know that you like them. You should side with those with whom friendship needs further cementing against those who are known, as Shakespeare would say, to be grappled to our souls "with hoops of steel." If a husband and wife get along well and are thought to get along well, then they may well direct some of the teasing against each other. They should very rarely gang up together against another — unless he is known to all to be their best mutual friend, such as the best man at the wedding, or the like. As a teacher, I sometimes tease the students collectively and individually. But I make it a point never to tease a class if I have just had difficulty with it about grades, or any individual student whom I cannot bring myself deep down in my heart to like much, or with whom, even though I like him, there has been any sort of friction — over grades, assignment, or behavior. This, I believe, is a rule one should apply to all raillery.
One should absolutely never tease except from a kindly and friendly heart. And the correct technique of teasing is that underneath the discomfiture we seem to be administering, there be a sort of implied compliment. Swift for all time laid down the correct technique of the matter. Properly executed, raillery is "to say something that at first appears a reproach or reflection, but by some turn of wit, unexpected and surprising, ends always in a compliment." Once the King met Dr. Johnson and reproached him for not having written anything lately. As the great lexicographer struggled to bear up against the reproach, the King said that he should not mind his having written nothing lately, if he had not formerly written so well. This in general ought to be the spirit of raillery. You say, "I am so sorry you were wearing your new hat the other day as you strolled through the square." Then as the wearer and others begin to think that perhaps you did not like her hat, you add, "It made it absolutely impossible for me to get a glimpse of your eyes." You say, "I am not on friendly terms with my mother just now. Yesterday, no matter how I begged her she refused me a second piece of her delicious pumpkin pie. When I came home a few hours later, what do I see, but a beggar sitting on the back steps eating that piece of pie." You say, "Have you noticed how Susan is eating lately — adding pounds and curves by leaps and bounds. Why, it is getting so one can't dance with her any more — without having three fellows rush up to cut in."
Related terms include improve english grammar and to improve speaking english.
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