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Gossip, Shoptalk, and Small Talk - part
6
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Articles In This Section:
· Gossip, Shoptalk, and Small Talk - part
1
· Gossip, Shoptalk, and Small Talk - part
2
· Gossip, Shoptalk, and Small Talk - part
3
· Gossip, Shoptalk, and Small Talk - part
4
· Gossip, Shoptalk, and Small Talk - part
5
· Gossip, Shoptalk, and Small Talk - part
6
· Gossip, Shoptalk, and Small Talk - part
7
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Since, then, shoptalk performs a valuable social function, why does it seem to be in conversational disrepute? One is that shoptalkers frequently flout the principle that one must not talk shop unless everyone is of the same shop. When three bricklayers and one watchmaker meet for lunch, only such part of the conversation may be about bricklaying as might interest any average man who owns or rents a house. Most of the conversation should be on a higher, more universal level, where bricklayers and watchmakers meet. It might be sports, politics, or economics. Shoptalk for that reason is usually out of place in mixed company. When three professors and their wives get together, the wives are not likely to appreciate the shoptalk of their husbands. Conversation should bring everybody into the circle, not exclude some of them. Common sense as well as courtesy, therefore, demands that the majority will not force their specialty, their shop problems, on the minority.
Among people of the same shop, some of the more progressive members will urge that they all get away from the "shop" now and then. This is right. However, the good conversationalist, rather than explicitly calling for a change of topic, will so try to raise the level from personalities to broader problems that the smell of the shop will practically be lost. In short, the only important rule about shoptalk is not to indulge in it when anyone is not of the shop.
When people of different shops, of different trades and professions, meet, they should at first properly indulge in what is called small talk. It is a sort of sparring for each other's interests. It is talk which flits back and forth on harmlessly personal or insignificantly impersonal topics. When three strangers are introduced and sit at the same table, they will talk a bit about the dining room, the city, the transportation system, the food, until by degrees, coming to know each other well enough, they will rise to more significant topics like the income tax, socialized medicine, and existentialism. Until they reach this level, they are indulging in small talk. It is an important art.
It is in technique like the comments about the weather. It is this technique applied to the dozens of other things besides the weather by which people are constantly surrounded. It offers a common ground for the most diverse people, and scope for wit and charm and information. Small talk, to quote Edwin Muir, may be said to be "a world in itself, and there we are perfectly safe from the things we are talking about."
The first source of small talk is the day's news. You comment on matters the others, too, may have read or seen. Small talk is factual, not opinionative. You simply state that congress today passed the rent law or that new parking meters were voted in by the city fathers or that a fire destroyed a warehouse. You mention certain shows or movies being advertised. You may add which of these you have seen recently. Athletic events, contests, certain religious ceremonies — all these if commented upon factually are good small talk.
Related terms include improve your speaking skills and how to improve speaking.
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