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The Mechanics and Rhetoric of Conversation - part 1

The importance of these merely mechanical aspects of con­versation were impressed upon me very painfully at an early age. When I was six, during a Sunday school class which many parents witnessed, the pastor, alluding to our Lord's being lost in the temple, asked if anyone could tell about it. When none responded, I ventured to raise my hand un­certainly, and before I realized the full enormity of my pre­sumption, I was on my feet telling this incident. The pastor warmly commended me, then, smilingly turning to the adults in the back, added somewhat apologetically, as if in a post­script, "Of course, it was rather much a string of and, and, and and then, but the story nevertheless."

This observation jolted me with an impact that, I like to think, knocked the most common rhetorical fault of most talkers out of me for good and all, and made me conscious of it in others. Since conversation should be a pleasurable and wholesome exchange of sentiments, facts, and ideas, anything that unnecessarily mars this pleasure must be avoided, and everything that furthers it should be utilized. All the books written and courses given, devoted to grammar, rhetoric, and diction have at the bottom no other purpose than to facilitate this pleasant and wholesome exchange among people of feelings, information, and opinions in writ­ing and in talking. Most persons would do well if now, in the light of more experience, they would review some of their school texts that dealt with these topics.

Good usage, a phase of grammar, is the etiquette of lan­guage. It is the linguistic manners of the best speakers every­where. A good conversationalist will as a matter of course try to conform to this good usage. As long as most refined and respected people avoid it ain't, between you and I, bursted, hadn't ought, should of paid, nowheres, busted, it don't, a person who wants to fulfill St. Paul's precept of graciousness, liveliness, and readiness will avoid them too. Such solecisms or illiteracies are to good conversation what notes slightly sharp or flat are to good music. And just as people who are used to poor music nevertheless enjoy good music when they get it, so people whose own speech is not free of usage faults find correct speech refreshingly pleasant and look for it in those whom they respect and want to look up to. All human beings want to improve, want to become more refined; they value a talker who shows them the good example, who without obtruding or parading it, simply talks correctly.

If you want to improve your conversation, you will make matters of good usage something of a hobby. Occasionally, in library or bookstore, you will leaf through a list of "Common Usage Errors" appended to most college composition books or rhetorics. In your own talk you will make it a point, in­formally as well as formally, to avoid these errors. You will say, He's lying (not laying) down. It doesn't (not don't) matter. He is unlucky like me (not like I).

Related terms include speak vocabulary and improving your speaking skills.